The Language of Love

I'm going to preface this post with one fact:  I think all social sciences are voodoo magic.

Now, I understand, that can be taken as a bit, or very, extreme, but I'm a microbiologist and I like things that are quantifiable and logical; social sciences just don't do that for me--if you ask a social scientist how sure they are of what they are presenting you're going to get a really weird answer and I'm not okay with that.

That being said, I do think that a lot of their ideas and studies stem from true doctrine and principles and when viewed in the right light the veil of magic can be lifted and true understanding can thing spring forth.  With that being said, there has been talk about the 'language of love' and how different people precept love and what is most important to them.  I took a test, along with my wife, and we both scored high on the 'acts of service' language, that when we do something for one another it shows our love in ways that we can both understand--her second, along with mine, was that of words of affirmation.

Now, I'm not saying that what the test said was completely true, or that it was completely false, but I do hold fast to what the Bible says:

"For in many things we offend all.  If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.  Behold, we put bits in the horses' mouths, that they may obey us; and we turn about their whole body," (James 3:2-3).

To replace hurtful words with words of love, or actions for that matter, is always a good thing and if I can make my wife happy I'm all for it.

I'm not saying we each need to take the survey, but we should pay attention to what our spouses enjoy and strive to help replace words and actions.

Media and Marriage

There's a lot that can be said on this topic, and the first and foremost falls in the lines of having to do with chastity and virtue.  The world in which we live is one that is plagued by distractions that will take us away from devoted discipleship, that will take us away from our spouses and from God.  There are images of girls wearing too little clothing, almost every television show nowadays has had some kind of lesbian kiss or relationship in it--porn is so easily accessed it's not even funny.

With that being said--how are we to protect ourselves, our spouses, and our children?

I've been trying to monitor my media usage this past week and I'm certainly not perfect--I struggle with lust, with temptation, and I'm pretty sure yoga pants will some how be the death of me, but I try each day to be better than I was the previous day.  That's what being a disciple of Jesus Christ is all about--we are to be perfect, as He commanded, but not right now; not at this very moment.  We have this whole mortal probation to reach toward that perfection and to learn grace by grace.

But, of course, there are things we can do.  I've recently removed Safari from my phone, have put restrictions on Youtube and try to not view anything via social media or a streaming service unless I'm with my wife--or in a public setting.

We are to have fidelity in our marriages and it's important that we choose to love our spouses each and every day and small choices, whether it's something we view, or something we spend our time on, can have dramatic consequences for the future.

The Excitement of a Small Girl

If you're not familiar with a Latter-day Saint Church service, I'll inform you of some of the things that go on--if you are, you can skip down a paragraph or so.

Spoiler alert:  Church is three hours.  It sounds scary, ominous, and like it's a giant chunk of a Sunday, but it's really an enjoyable experience and you'll never regret staying each hour because of the Spirit you feel and the lessons that you will learn from that Spirit.  That being said, one of the Church hours is a sacrament meeting, where we partake of bread and water in remembrance of Christ and to renew promises that we have made with Him.  Holders of the Priesthood will bless the bread and water and other Priesthood holders will then pass the bread and water, via trays, to the rest of the congregation.

Well, during the Sacrament service this week you could hear a little girl scream:  "Yay, the water!"

This little girl was so excited to be able to partake of the emblems of Christ and it made me, and I'm sure others, wonder:  Am I this excited every Sunday to partake of the emblems of Christ?  Am I this excited to live the gospel of Jesus Christ?  Am I this excited to wake up each Sunday to go to three hours worth of Church meetings?

A prophet wrote:  "And now behold, I say unto you, my brethren, if ye have experienced a change of heart, and if ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now," (Alma 5:26).

What a penetrating question.

There are a myriad of things we can apply that question to, but for this post I want to apply it to our marriages.

When we were courting there was an abundance of laughter, of lingering looks, of expressions of care and love--but are those still strong in our marriages?

As I pondered that, for myself, I've realized I treat my marriage almost like a chore, or another thing to check off the list--life is busy and it seems like there isn't time for romance. This should never be the case and I want to do all I can to remedy this before things actually get overwhelmingly busy.